Stupid Status Updates

God some peoples status updates annoy me.

Post some stupid updates that you've seen on Facebook recently.

Here's one, it doesn't even make sense.

"Before sex, you help each other get naked. After sex, you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life, no one helps you once you've been f******"

I get it

All the most stupid status updates I get are either from extended family who I didn't want on fb anyway. They represent what happens when everybody gets on board of something.

PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO EVERYONE! Do NOT open any message called blah blah blah it's a virus blah blah and it will vaporise your hard drive root c:\ 21gigawatt file blah DELETE IT IMMEDIATELY.

Friends are wonderful, they make you laugh, they blah blah blah post this as your status update is you have a friend blah blah and let them know blah blah derp.

I stand up for my beliefs and if someone calls me a derp blah blah derp then I'm a produ blah blah x20 and some little ascii symbols paste this in your profile if you are proud to be a derp.

Or the mis-placed political activism:

We should be allowed to beat our children! Here, sign this if you agree! Go John Key btw!

On the other hand I have have someone who posts conspiracy theory after big business is bad after government are cunts after what's in our food and GMO after... Which one might think would appeal to me (not the conspiracy bit) BUT it doesn't just get boring and irritating as fuck but the posts sometimes seem ill informed and anti science.

Yeah.
Then there are the nonsensical likes. 20 of them at the same time you never get to see what they all are anyway.

.....Anyway.......

oh yeah I said "either" extended family because I was going to finish the sentence with "or classmates that I'm not actually friends with" but decided that they don't seem too frequent and quite a few of them are amusing (in a laugh at, not with way).

I hate those ones that go something like....

"most people wont repost this in their updates, only my true friends will..."


Fk off with your status update blackmail!

I hate the updates that are like “ I just did a big clean up of facebook friends and you made it thru the cut “.. umm wtf how egotistical is that.. meh.

I might have annoying updates I’m not sure, I used to post a lot about all the exercise I was doing that was just cos I was stoked with myself like missioning it up Mt Eden most days dayum how awesome is that haha... but I’m bored of facebook these days … I find I’m adding stupid groups and commenting on stupid stuff.. kinda lost it’s mojo ?

Can't stand that retarded Bob Marley(?) quote that everyone seems to have quoted on their page.

"The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you, the thing is to only spend time with those worth hurting for"

Or something along those lines.

Fuck off.

I don't care enough about my facebook time to care about peoples stupid status updates

I've stopped yelling at the moon too

thanks to kronic I am a new man

I hate the "do I work? of course, I am a mum...." ones.

hahaha are you like the anti-feminazi or something Just*? :>

Some can be quite entertaining.

Doing the rounds:

"yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery and today is a gift... that is why it is called the present"

Just is the Betty Draper of the Biggie world. :>

That Marilyn Monroe quote pisses me off something terrible.

I post updates that spark arguments and debates, I get so far with it and then get bored, thus leaving people to argue on my page. I am very lazy ATM.

The only updates I really can't stand are the chain ones.. "It's haemorrhoid week! 43 out of 6 people suffer from haemorrhoids at some point in their lives. It takes 12 seconds to repost this, most won't, will you?"

No. Fuck off.

hrmm that's for women on the DPB to feel they're working... they should come and do my job for a day then they'll see what a job is.

and I'm a mum too and dont' consider it a job .. She's a huge focus of my life but not my job..

/rant

Yeah that one that’s like you wanna get up in my grill when I’m acting like a raving PMS lunatic and don’t like it.. your loss fool…

I used to have that one on my thing then took it off

probably.

I just hate those ones because it seems very defensive like someone accused them of being lazy when no one did. Be secure in yourself, have some self esteem

I also hate the cancer/disease ones "repost this if someone you know has been affected by [insert disease]". Fuck sakes, everyone has been affected by cancer, have an original thought.

Hahaha Insanity! is that actually from your Facebook page or did you find it on a internet site?

Also, the attention seeking melodramatic updates annoy me, like in the case of this girl who also uploads new photos of herself on a daily basis:

"ou don't have the rights to judge me!.."
"I hate listening to Love songs..too much drama oii!"
"I don't mean to be rude,but I don't like anyone now.. I'm just being friendly to everyone..I need time for myself..cheers everyone!"
"HOPELESS!"
"the most UNLUCKY day of my life"
"Don't talk to me when I'm angry!.."
"HORRIBLE!"
"if you want to be happy, be"

one or two weeks worth from the same person

That reminds me Davil, I also hate those mysterious ones that people put up and don't explain. its usually drama llamas. If you're going to have drama, at least entertain facebook with it instead of being all FML and not sharing.

Thats Kung Fu panda

Hahaha. :>

Today, I am appalled with various updates showing a distinct lack of education. Classic example:


Oh my fricken God.

hahaha. Yep, but I did that the other day. I knew it would get ignored with "wtf whatever next" (if that even) and that suited me. I said "wasteland"
It was actually in response to seeing one of those updates I mentioned in my first post. About facebook. Once everyone is on fb that's what it's about to become. Even if everyone stays on it. It will be a wasteland of even crappier crap than the current crap.

Holy shit I HATE THOSE SO FUCKING MUCH!

I actually wrote something on one of my staunch mummy friends pages about how being a mum is not a fricking job, it's LIFE.

She was complaining about people who always offload their kids, when you shouldn't because although they are tiring, it's all part of the job!

Fuck off woman, if I want a night off I'll have a night off. I am not glued to my child.

roaaaaaaaaaaaar.

Magic!

But there's a big difference between "having a night off" and "always offload".

Exactly!!!

My aunty posted this today (as an aside, is she still your aunty if she married your mums brother but they divorced? or do you just call them your cousin's mother?)

I have to laugh at people who are against smacking.. my parents smacked me and I didn't hate them.. I didn't have trust issues with them because of it... I didn't fear them... But I darn sure respected them! And I learned what my boundaries were, and knew what would happen if I broke them.. I wasn't abused, I was disciplined....*Re-post if you got your ass smacked and survived it.



I was never smacked and I respected my parents and was well behaved

People commenting on the rioting with things like 'get a job lol'.

Yes but even having a night off = poor parenting in these peoples eyes

tbh it sounds like some of you have real problems in terms of who you haven't got on limited profile, who you haven't clicked "hide updates from" on, and who you haven't just deleted totally.

i mean shit, i think i got it bad when i have to hide people with moronic right wing views, and then i find you clowns are dealing with bullshit like this? hahahaha.


Smiley: I don't know why you're even still on FB. Just delete your account and be done with it.

Heh, my "hide updates from" list is growing...

Basically applies to all crazies and right wing nuts on my feed. Get offa my facebook!

I did a pretty emo one a few days back, i figure that's acceptable every once in a while

Kris, sometimes we NEED this stupidness in our lives, it can be entertaining
Like the chick who posted a link to the biggest weight loss scam I have come across in my life. I raged about it for 4 days, but I'll keep her on for further updates.

Well the interface was (perhaps grudgingly) bolted on as a bit of an after thought as the facebook paradigm is "share with everyone" consequently the interface an functionality behind it is a bit clunky, limited and hard to to use. Okay I can see you will dispute that though now that you own an iPod touch you might start to recognise that tech is not meant to make you fuck around with it. You have to fuck around with facebook. That makes it pretty shit.
There is also a sense of futility in changing anything with facebook as their next round of updates will change it back and probably expose you to the world for good measure. Added to this is not THAT important in the great scheme of things. A thread like this where you get to whine about how shit it is is enough really. TBH I don't really want facebook to work for me and I don't want to piss around with it either as I'm patiently waiting until something else comes along to take it's place. It will happen.
The concept of "social networking" (stupid name) is great. But facebook isn't the be all of it. It is however how I manage to talk with classmates after hours (we make heavy use of facebook groups) and friends occasionally. And see or share the odd amusing or interesting story or media.

But godforbid I actually criticise the site on it's faults.

That said, I have hidden a couple.

I never found a few clicks particularly taxing, but hey, that's just me. *shrug*

It's not about a few clicks (though too many is annoying), it's about locating the functionality in the first place and knowing that it's what you are looking for and that it will behave as expected. It's also about the amount of mental effort one is will to expend on a site which is not much. It sounds trivial and pedantic but it's the stuff that makes or breaks sites. Facebook hasn't had much competition yet and consequently people just don't use it's crappy interface for anything too advanced. If google can offer things that are important to people and it's much easier to use, in my humble opinion it had a fighting chance of people flocking to it simply because it's easier to use and because facebook's ways have set up so many people with a personal grudge against the site.

I thought it was a great site a couple of years ago, but it's a walled garden, it's protective of it's data (which is OUR data) in ways that are... microsoft-ish, and it seems to blatantly disregard user's privacy - they want to change the way social structures have always functioned. Who are they to say how we should communicate or that their model is better? Their model only suites one entity, and that is facebook.

Some more that piss me off, the updates which are basically just attention seeking bragging/showing off about something.. but pretending to be about something else.

eg. "SO, INTERVIEW FOR A MAGAZINE: As a beauty icon how did it affect your life and lovelife? INSIDE THOUGHT: I'm a beauty icon? you should see me at home.. I barely dress up for production with days of not sleeping! ROFL..."

"A Hongkong film project... check!
A contract with Thailand... check!
Magazine directing........... check!
A Manila network job........ check!
A full day off.................... MISSING!"

i could post so many more.. all from the same person

I saw a pretty stupid one the other day:

ALL THE PHONE NUMBERS IN YOUR PHONE are now on Facebook.
No joke - go to the top right of the screen, click on Account,
Then click on 'Edit Friends', go left on the screen and click on 'Contacts'.
All phone numbers from your phone (FB friends or not) are published.

Please Repost this on your Status, so your friends can remove their numbers and thus prevent abuse if they do not want them published. You can block this app by following instructions from your contact page

yes, lots of people have been posting that. But apparently you can access friends of friends phone numbers now too? i haven't bothered looking into it.

I don't like when people post something as if its actually important or people will acre- which is actually most of the time. I like posting something that makes you think or debate.

Is it wrong that I'm having difficulty with the fact that I can't 'like' peoples posts in this thread?

for today

update : its snowing in auckland
update: sleeting
update: raining
update: sheep are eating my vagina
update: replace sheep with rats and vagina for my dead body
update: suns out
update: time for tea
update: I wish I had a vagina and a sheep

typical day really