Help!

hey ummm i got a really close mate who is 19 and shes pregnant. She isnt with the guy anymore and she doesnt want to tell him which doesnt bother me. the thing is she has no idea what to do coz her mum will kill her if she finds out but she doesnt believe in abortion. Can anyone please help me?

Would her mom really kill her?
Like disown her and never want n e thing to do with her sorta thing????

If So then I have no idea!

If its not that sorta kill her thing..then mayb the parents could help..or u could help her urself..Mayb go to a counsellor or something

her mum would kick her out of home and never talk to her again thats how bad it is! i just feel really bad that i cant help her

eek..well u can do ur best and be a good pal..Just don't go ditching her..Cos she'll prolly need good pals to be around..as for the guy that she isn't with..GrRrR that really sux....

yer well guys are dicks me and my friend both no that :/ the thing is she doesnt really want a kid at her age but she doesnt want to have an abortion. i'm pretty sure there must be other ways but i dont know, if anyone has any ideas please let me know!

adoption .. is probably the best thing aye .. if she wants to keep the baby she can get help from the government and should get help from her Ex ... I duno there are heaps of ppl out there that want children but cant have them so adoption would be good .. i suggest she talks to family planning or someone she can trust .. or u could look online
If u want someone to email angelkirby@hotmail.com... but yeh i suggest fam planning they young people out with all kinda options

If she's not going to have a termination, then she's going to have to tell her parents. They may well surprise her - you never know... If they do boot her out, there are organisations (yes, WINZ too) that can help out with support, accommodation, and benefits... then I guess she just needs to decide whether to keep it or not.
Chances are, though.. that once she tells them, they'll certainly be pissed, but they can hardly turf out two sets of their own flesh and blood. If they didn't love her, she'd be on her own by now, and if they do, they'll get over it and start helping.

A similar thing happened to a friend of mine at 18, and now I have a beautiful three-year-old godson, whose grandparents love him to bits!

well said purple lollie

umm i'm not joking her mum told her to get out last year for some really stupid reason she will kick her out her family is wacked! another thing is it will screw up her education and the looking online think already done it theres not much out there. its just shes really scared and doesnt know where to look for help and well i dont really know much about this stuff either.
I mean if she did have an abortion where do you go how much is it i dont know jake about this thats why i want people to tell me. I know she would want to be stronge maybe even keep the kid, but she's not that stronge. shes got her own problems and i know she just would be able to do it unless her mum helped out which i know 100% thats never going to happen.

im not sure where you go.. but just tel her to go to her docter. if she was going to have the abortion... it can stay confidential from her parents.. they never have to find out. (if thats what she wants)

I hate probems like this.. an dheaaring about them makes me sad...

i hope everything works out for her and you.. Sorry im no help.. I suck!

you dont suck paris thanks for trying to help. she doesnt really want to have an abortion but at the moment i think its the only option she has. it really sucks i know coz she loves kids so much. i guess i'll have to tell her what i've done on biggie hope she doesnt kill me oh well least you guys have given me some hope if you want i'll tell you whats going on.

when we figure it out i mean........

parents like to be hard ass's
they just want to have a strong hold over the 'children'. my parents have been really hard on me and they have tried to 'kick me out' but when i said...ok go on then, they just went oh
honestly parents love their kids so much and maybe they dont even show it but they do.

look im sorry for not really helping but what u have to do as a friend is that u have to be there for her. im sure u love her to bits so u are going to have to show her that in every little bit in her life. get all her friends to help, dont just do it by ur own

sorry i probably aint much help either but i tried

hope everything goes well for ur friend and give her a hug from me!

any update?

ummmm not yet the thing is everyone thinks that a family wouldnt do that but hers would i'm not joking when i've said what i have. Shes ok at the moment coz theres no time to rush she's still got heaps of time to think about what she wants to do. then again its easy for me to say coz i'm not the one throwing up all the time yer well i think i'll get her to see a docotor next week when we both have a little more time.

just another thing is you may think you have heaps of friends but when it comes to things like this you find out who your real friends are. looks like its just me i know its sad but life sucks most of the time.

Handy hint... Family Planning are heaps cheaper and less likely to look down their noses at you.

yer well i was looking in the fone book but i cant find any family planning clinks just doctors

That's odd - what city are you in?

i'm on the north shore our fone book sucks anyways got work to do thats guys!

Theres an 0800 Number somewhere..

vamp where bouts on the shore ?

suggest she visits the fpa (family planning association) they will probably be best equipped to explain the options regarding adoption and all other avenues, I'm sure they won't object to peer support, so perhaps you could go with her.

I don't think appointments are nessecary and there's offices in takapuna, town and newmarket ( that I know of, and probably more).

VampirePrincess.... email me (i'm pretty sure you know my email)

k thats great i'm in Glenfield and sorry aims dont have your e-mail dont know why i should have it?????

amalyse@hotmail.com, please send me an email. thanks

i sent you an email

Think shes going to keep it hope its the right thing. oh well