Does this count as a threat? :P

Okay so here's the story:

I just moved into this new apartment in Melbourne with a (so I thought) lovely chick on Thursday who owns the place. I moved in at 7pm - we spent a couple hours chatting on the couch, things seemed to be going swimmingly, then went to bed. Friday and Saturday we didn't see too much of each other - I was busy with trying to track down a bed and some other bedroom furniture, and catching up with a few friends. Saturday evening I was feeling really meh so just stayed in my room watching DVDs.

On Sunday afternoon (3 days after I moved in) - she called me to the lounge to have a "chat" - and confided that she didn't think it was really working out. Obviously I'm pretty shocked and ask her what's wrong, and she says that she's been living with friends for the past 6 years and not really used to living with someone she doesn't know, and she's used to being "in each others space" quite a lot, and thinks that I'm too much of a private person. She says she thought she was going to be able to adapt, but "it's been really difficult" and doesn't know if she can. I say okay, thanks for bringing it up, shall we see what happens after a few weeks? Maybe spend more time together? Go out for dinner or something and get to know each other more? But she says she "knows herself" and doesn't think it will help, and then gave me 1 month's notice. So right - she "knows herself" but drastically underestimated her ability to adapt? Righty-o.

Anyway she came over later and said she doesn't want there to be hard feelings, and how it's not about my character etc. I said I think she's being really unfair, and basically judging what I'm like as a person and as a flatmate after 3 days, which is really unreasonable. She says she thinks I'm a nice person so it's not about that. I say, (and this is 100% verbatim) "How do you know I'm nice? I could be a serial killer for all you know". And she rolled her eyes and says "I don't think you're one" - and then we carried on talking for like 5 more minutes about what was fair in this situation, we didn't agree, so I went to bed. So fine - I started looking for another place today.

Now tonight - I get home, sitting in the lounge sending some emails - and she comes in with a guy friend of hers and tells me that she doesn't feel safe in the place with me any more because of the serial killer comment, and kept asserting that this constitutes a threat, and now she's going to call the Police if I don't get out tonight ?!? WTF. I basically told her no shot - I'm a pretty reasonable person, and I'm actively looking for a place, but I'm not just going to get thrown out on the street because I did not threaten her at all, and I apologised for saying that.

So she just started kinda crying and went with her guy friend in her room. No idea wtf to do now. Dunno if she's going to call the Police or just throw my shit out and change the locks or whatever :S Can she just kick me out immediately because of that?

For all followers of my other thread: now I'm going to have to go back to the movign people and tell them it's not 7th floor after all lols. FML seriously.

sheesh you move fast bro

seem like moving is the best choice anyway, bitch seems fucking crazy.

hahahahaha I cannot believe the situations you get yourself into

My guess is that she can't just kick you out assuming you've signed some sort of contract, but if she doesn't feel safe and calls the cops I suspect they'll "strongly suggest" you get out asap.

Um yeah, good luck with this one bro :>

short answer, in law that's not a threat, it's simply a comment

I know I don't know how it happens. Sure when I'm dealing with customer service people I'll often antagonise things, but this time I did absolutely nothing.. I really thought she was cool and we were getting along great :s

Fucking nutty females everywhere you turn.

Mrs Armstrong suggests that you suggest that if she feels insecure/unsafe that the guy friend stays over, because obviously you're not going to be able to leave tonight....


plus, bonus extra victim.

this is the karma payback for winning all those rego/moving firm type letters
but yeh you blew it with the 'serial killer' comment coz you didnt know her well enough yet to drop that shit
and yeh crazy bitch too.

Classic case of spineless bint that is just making excuses. She doesn't want you as her flatmate. Hit her over the head with a shovel. Find a newer, more awesomer place to live. Bury her under the floorboards of fancy new crib. Done and Done.

Christ you've been here all of 5 minutes and you're already causing a shit storm.

She is probably fairly insecure but it would seem that she has never learnt how to live with someone that's more of an independent type.

Anyone that has had numerous flat mates is typically pretty happy to get someone that keeps to themselves and just pays the bills in fact for many that's ideal . Those who want someone more sociable will usually make this clear on the advert and sometimes you just have to read between the lines a bit.

Anyway there probably wasn't much you could do to avoid this, she sounds like a bit of a newbie when it comes to the whole living with randoms thing.

In saying that the serial killer comment was a really really bad idea and quite why you would spring that one on her is beyond me. haha. That was never going to go down well under the circumstances.

I would try and find someone a bit more techy / geeky and generally on-to-it to live with...

btw, leave her this url so she can see what a stupid fucking retarded bitch she is.

...not that she will of course, cos well, she is a stupid retarded bitch and stupid retarded bitches never know when they are being stupid retarded bitches, that's part of what makes them a stupid retarded bitch.

seriously cracks me up

had a similar situation once in London

Perhaps she isn't feeling threatened at all and has just seized on a convenient way to expedite Yaksha's exit having realised after 3 days that she doesn't want to live with him.

^^^^ this.

Anyways, sorry to hear that dude - knowing what it's like looking for a flat in a city, it would be extremely frustrating. Hopefully you find a new place soon with cooler, less psycho people. Good luck.

holy lol!

Fuck I do love biggie sometimes. Yes, it's a shit situation to be in, but god damn it makes good morning reading while you're eating some toast!

Good luck with that. Sounds like you need to get out ASAP. It's reasonable she gives you adequate time to look for a new place though. If she really feels that threatened and concerned by your remark, keep everything above board and just suggest to her to have a friend stay over until you find alternative accommodation.

What a crazy biatch!

bugger... a situation where written correspondence won't suffice

double bugger - biggies shame on you no one ahs asked if she is hot? This place really has changed

Woah! She sounds like an absolute psycho!

Sounds like you better get out of there fast before YOU end up dead under the floorboards...

What a bitch to do that to someone who has just moved into the country. I'd say you should stain her carpet or something nasty but then you wouldn't get your bond back.

Obviously she had high expectations and he just didn't meet them ...

she's not a customer services representative is she?

In NZ I think she can legally ask you to leave immediately. But you on the other hand can suggest reasonable notice. She can then call the Police, but who know's if they really want to get involved? You haven't broken the law. There is probably leeway for discretion on their part if you deal with them reasonably, and point out how your trust in the situation has been violated - ie you are the victim not her.

Very unpleasant situation. Had a similar situation but in reverse when in Sydney; crazy bint who wouldn't get out of our personal spaces moved in and drove us crazy.

However we gave her three months until she found a place, as a simple difference of personality is no-one's fault. Her bemoaning your supposed incompatibility and then throwing crocodile tears into the mix is simply fucked. I hate it when grown women can't deal with adulthood and cry to get what they want

Clearly you should have slept with her. In fact what you should do is offer her sex right now. See if her male friend is keen too. Sex resolves everything!

what a freaky chick.

I reckon sort it with her that you can move asap (so she doesnt get your ass for moving out with out notice) get a new place and get your stuff moved straight there by that moving company if they haven't dropped it off yet.

POOR YOU. : (

http://www.domain.com.au/Property/For-Rent/Apartment/VIC/St-Kilda/?adid=6718017

Work it, she's desparate to get rid by the sounds so say that you're going to have to incur extra moving costs now and she should meet those. Typical chick BS though, I don't want there to be bad blood... How can there not be bad blood? You're kicking someone out within days of them arriving in the country for wishy washy reasons you stupid bint. Now has seemingly jumped on that comment to force the issue because she probably is worried it will be awkward with you there.

I had a similar but less messed up situation when I first moved to Welington, one day after moving in I was told the lease was up in 3 weeks and the flat would be disbanding. Thankfully I hadn't paid bond yet (although I'd already paid two weeks rent after being on holiday prior to moving in, so they didn't have any comeback when I didn't pay the last 2 weeks rent. I think they were intelligent enough to realise that trying to get rent out of me in that situation wouldn't have been worth it.

I did end up in the coolest flat I've lived in as a result so it worked out okay.

I love how you lads immediately jump on the chick call, haha. Having said that, when I was flatting I refused to live with girls as they are usually too much hard work.

This is a pretty crap situation and TBH, it sounds like you will be better off getting out now.

However, there is a perverse part of me that wants you to wind this situation up a little and see how freaked out you can really get her.. Stupid bint.

When is a guy ever going to say: 'Sorry brah, after three days I just know deep down in my heart that despite you being sweet and us getting along as well, we're not going to be the perfect flatmates I envisaged us being. It's not you it's me... I don't want this to come between us though as you're a cool guy. But GTFO."

?

heh.. the thought has obviously occured to me too

Speaking of that... I was having a look through the Residential Tenency Act 1997 about notice periods with kicking someone out, and it looks like her 28 days notice is bogus too. She hasn't even given me any notice (just verbally, which doesn't count) - but even if she did, from what I can gather, it'd pretty much have to be 90 days notice. There's a whole bunch of specified reasons for which you can kick someone out, and all of them have prescribed notice periods. I really don't think that my situation qualifies for any of them except possibly this one:



So she told me before that she owns the place. Presumably she is a 'mortgagee' since she's only 26. But I don't really understand this clause. Does this mean that she can kick me out for whatever reason with 28 days notice just because she owns the place? It's worded kinda weirdly.

I think that means if you buy the place you have to give the existing tenant 28 days notice, although perhaps that only covers a defalt and sale when I re-read that. But from what I can see it has nothing to do with your situation.

Are you on the lease? Or is it informal?

If you haven't signed a lease and paid bond you are rpetty much fucked.

Dude, I think the law is the last thing you need to be concerned about atm. Sure it will buy you some time for her not being able to kick you out. But really, do you want to live/spend anymore time with someone like that for longer than you have to?

gfot as soon as possible imo.

I've signed a residential tenency agreement.. Is that the same as a lease? I haven't paid bond yet, but I told her that was going to be a little later, so she wrote on the tenency agreement that it's due on the 20th.

Agree

I don't want to stay there - but I think if I can demonstrate that she has to give me 90 days notice, then I have a tonne of leverage to ask her to give me my rent back for screwing me around Something like that...

Yeah - I'd just find another place and leave asap. Don't pay your bond, as you'll probably be able to get out in two weeks. And just let her know your plans - preferably followed up by email / letter so there's no confusion.

I think his main concern is that he can live with her as long as he needs to... Meaning more than another day. Imagine coming home and finding your stuff in the lobby?

Yak- Have you spoken to her since she said GTFO now?

Call Consumer Affairs Victoria on 1300 55 81 81.

They will tell you what you are entitled to.

at risk of offending but perhaps you are not a very nice person to live with...

I mean the sound of constant letter writing alone would upset me

I knocked on her door and asked if she can take her stuff out of the washing machine so I can wash some stuff, and she said yeah and did it pretty quickly... That's it though. Tonight will be interesting I guess

Well... of all the random women I've moved in with in my life - 50% have ended up in a long term relationship with me, and 50% have threatened to call the police after 3 days. So we need more data i think :>

I think you've answered the question

might I suggest the wearing of pants...

That's good you have all kinds of rights now as regards notice periods, etc.
While she may be loopey, there's no evidence yet that she is dangerous or likely to destroy property so you should be fine

no EVIDENCE????

she left her washing in the machine

Well within 3 days of joining biggie most of us were asking you to leave. Stick at it dude.

And buy a hockey mask, a meat pack, and a cleaver, and prepare a make up dinner for her.

Holy shit, Yak! You poor bastard, that sucks man...28 or 90 or no days notice aside, it's not like you can just "GTFO out now", eh? Finding a new place to crash takes time, short of going to a hotel and putting stuff in storage, which is a huge expense...she really needs to chill the fuck out and at least accept it's gonna take some time for you to find a new pad...freaking nutcase!

Be sure to email her this URL when you leave though!

Read her some lyrics from a band called "Pungent Stench" and tell her it's your poetry, she will never bother you again.

hahahahahahahaahaha! <3

insanity - you in melbourne????

.... help a biggie out man

3 days at least

Could be a serial killer for all I know

If you feel that you need to get out now and just have somewhere to chill for a week, seriously, check out www.couchsurfing.com I stayed with a dude in Melbourne for a week in this sick as converted warehouse ... couchsurfing rocks. Apart from it being a free service which I've used all over the world (and hosted maybe 15 people in NZ) it's a great way to meet locals.

Are you in Melbourne? They've actually got an online forum thing like to biggie. I could chuck out a few feelers and see if any can host you for a few weeks?

heh all good Itchy - thanks though. I have a couple friends I can crash with if completely necessary, just doing all I can to avoid that at the moment. Got a couple leads on new places from gumtree so will see how those pan out..

by even caring about what the legislation is here you show your complete inability to relate

the problem is your interaction with others... when you realise this your life might change if not you will continue

I see your point peat but this chick sounds like a retard to start with.

we only have one side of the story

but never let that get in the way of a good old females are fucked in the head thread

heh thanks Freud, but I never really have any problems in this respect. I'm pretty different IRL I've always gotten on well with people of all walks of life (except stupid people). The only reason I'm considering the legislation now is because it's supremely relevant to me. Last night she tried to evict me from my home at 8pm without a care for where I would go. At all stages up until now I've been trying to reason with her that things take time, and I suggested that we spend more time together so that she feels more comfortable etc. Now, I don't really have a choice. She's trying to invoke laws to get rid of me, I have to be aware of them to have any way of fighting back right?

Totally agree Yak; wtf random hat0rz? Have you not heard the axiom never bring a knife to a gun fight??

Not knowing your rights in this situation would be supremely stupid imo

This is true we have one side... But I'm going off knowing Yaksha personally (he's actually really reasonable irl) and having run into a few nutty chicks, they are a definite and identifiable subtype of the female category.

Their emotions rule them - which is fine, mine can rule me sometimes - but coupled with that is the fact that they think their feelings are far more important than anyone else's, and, AND worse, their feelings are usually the most fucking stupid bullshit ever. So you wind up pandering to someone who's whole position is weak in the first place.

Oh and "your too private" got me too. I fucking HATE people that think your doing something wrong by not getting in their face and annoying them. "Why aren't you entertaining me? Isn't that your job?? Why aren't you asking me how I feel??" [slap slap slap]

Yeah - this, and that I'm actually not that private a person. I'm very social - but life has been extremely busy since I got here trying to set everything up, so excuse me if I needed a little quiet time to myself the first couple days

None of this would have happened if you had bought a cold riveted locker to the table.

Shoud come home hammer time drunk on Friday and crank the music whilst inhaling 100s of canisters and doing rails off the furniture - knocking on her door to invite her every half hour or so. Then she'll see what social really is.

lol, the anger Smiley...

Women can be incredibly inconsiderate creatures to live with that is for sure. I generally find guys to be more considerate overall.

At the very least, you could have hacked her up and put her in it. :>

You wouldn't need to, she would have lusted after it and him. That would turn his 50 / 50 into a perfect 100%

Awesome thread. haterz please sit down. Where would we be without indivuals posting their social dilemnas for us to dissect?

When you spent this time in your room, did you close the door? Im thinking you probably did.... and some people, particulary home owners, consider this an affront. Sure...at bed time its acceptable but some folk have a queer sense that during the day the flow of the house should be maintained with all doors left ajar. Its like....They think they should be able to come over and say something to you while you are in your room at 2pm, not have to knock on the door. I also have had a flatmate/landlord who would let me know in weirdly indirect ways that he didnt like me closing my door

I can just see you sitting there watching DVD after DVD blissfully unware as a somewhat nuerotic home owner paced about the house fretting about being inexplicitly locked out of "her spare room" I bet you heard a lot of banging/organising noises

This is just one of those little idiosycracies of flatting where fundemental but obscure ideals have clashed. Sort of Looks like both of you were not honest or thorough enough when you discussed how "social" an arrangement you needed.

That's all very well and good Maestro - except for the fact that it was 3 days! Actually only two days.
I arrived Thursday night and we chatted in the lounge for ages before I went to bed, and then she dropped the bombshell on Sunday when I got up in the late morning. So it was only Friday and Saturday that she had to form these opinions :/ And even then, she didn't even give me a chance to see how things play out. If she was just honest about wanting an open door policy I could have accomodated that... It was just yeah but nah - seeya

So true (Maestro's observations). Although when someone is paying for said room, they can really do what they like, lots of dipshitty landlords don't get this concept.

You really *are* Larry David btw

"I could be a serial killer for all you know" hahahahahahahaha so awesome

What if he was having a Maesty marathon? He said he was watching DVDs after all and didn't specify what type.

Yak in NZ at least where someone is living with someone else they are classified as a boarder and are NOT covered by the various types of residential legislation.

I know this because I was flatting with someone in Welly and they gave me 3 weeks notice so I rang various govt agencies and they said they coulda have kicked me out sans notice and I'd have not a leg to stand on.

Fucking psycho girls with their stupid emotions and mood swings.

I had just started seeing this girl, got along really well, she is really hot, funny.. and sings trance vocals to boot! but then we all went away on the weekend to Bantayan Island, everything was going fine.. me and her were going to get a hotel room together. Then we all got bikes, she was on the back of mine when i crashed it. No one was injured, and i felt really bad and apologized. But she just wouldn't let it go, then later on that night starts flirting with this other guy. So then when we were both really drunk, we had a massive argument on the dance floor of a club.

the next day was fairly awkward... think i blew that one. But surely the way she acted was a bit out of line seen as though the crash was a accident...

Sorry Yak /hijack /rant

vads is right

if you are not a tenant (name on the lease) then you are a mere licencee (boarder)

the legal tenant (occupier) can revoke that licence at any time

Bro I've had an argument with a gf end up with me sitting in an East London jail on domestic abuse charges when the only 'abuse' that occurred was her throwing crockery at me.

She owns the place and I signed a residential tenency agreement with her..
Does that not count?

Yes it does.

Shitty situation.

SO THAT IS WHY YOU LEFT LONDON YOU CRIMINAL!!!

Dude you crashed a bike with a girl on the back who had placed her trust in you to keep her safe

Getting dumped is the very least you can expect for that one. Id keep an eye out for her dad too

Jono, was it over from there or did her seductive eyes and sweet promises of crazy bedroom antics chain you and your stupid male desires to her craziness for a little bit longer?

Your problem is this..


It was never going to go well, IMO.

Seriously, she sounds like a pleb if thats what her problem is. You should be glad to be rid of her.

DOWN WITH PSYCHO WIMMINS!

Davil: What constituted as "flirting"? Was she just talking to some guy or actually touching, dirt dancing, rubbing up against him? Do you think you might have over reacted?

Beware living in a house with the owner. You lose so many rights you would have otherwise.

Darn... that girl sounds like a space cadet. It just goes to show, every time you think you've met a well adjusted, level headed girl it is only a matter of time before they prove you wrong.

Known davil for a long time and if he says she flirted that is what she did.

can't believe you crashed

I so had the incidental music from curb.in my head as I imagined this scenario. Lol

of course it does

you have the rights due to you under the tenancy

assuming the document you signed IS a valid tenancy agreement under Australian law, and would not be construed by a court to be something else

It was an accident! and not very serious crash...

plus her parents live in Hong Kong



Yeah i guess. It just sucks working together, as whenever i walk past her i think "damn, i could be tapping that right now".



Yeah definitely flirting... plus i think they're seeing each other now? I definitely maybe over reacted with what i said when i was extremely drunk that night.. i just can't really remember what it was i said. But by that stage it was pretty much over and done with anyway.



heh.. i know. i was actually quite bummed about the whole thing, ruined what would have been a perfect weekend. On the flipside, i got back to the studio late sunday night and went to the bar to drown my sorrows... and bumped into this russian girl i met a few weeks back, who i am now taking out to dinner tomorrow night

well maybe that could organise for a local TRIAD to come after you

heh sure it was an "accident". But in the very least you were probably a bit careless and its only luck that stopped you and/or her from being seriously injured. One of your fundemental responsibilities as a mate is to keep your girl safe from harm, and in this regard crashing a bike with her on the back is a giant air shot

I dont doubt your contrition, its obvious you were mortified and rightly so. I just think her reaction is totally understandable and after an incident like that I would expect to get dumped from a fledging relationship 100% of the time .

gl with the Russian, no more motorcycles plse

Russian girl eh? Regular trips to Dubai?

Wow, either you dont know women, or I am part man..

IMO, tis a total overreaction on her behalf! No one was hurt, except for maybe Davils pride. This seems an imperative moment to take the piss out of him, to point and laugh.. I would have teased him mercilessly abvout it!

But then, this from the girl who achieved her first Dukes of Hazard jump driving an old ute up a river bank with a massive piece of macrocarpa on the back earlier this year. Falling off a moped is childs play.

That was the end of it.

Reaction- All got sorted the following day when she told them what had actually happened but was quite concerned about being deported at the time.

Back to Yaksha......While it appears she is mainly at fault I think you made a few small mistakes there mate. I wouldnt have closed my bedroom door during the day on a home owner like that within a few days of moving in, at least not without explaining why I was doing it (ie not feeling well) I dont think there is anything wrong with your behaviour in a vaccum, its just that Ive lived with home owners before and its a completely different situation than "flatting"

What you did was applied the house dynamic of your previous flat to your new one when the make up of new one was quite different. ie two highly independant guys renting an apartment vs.... a landlord-tenant situation were the landlord is quite needy/nosey/hyper-social.

She made even bigger mistakes though. She didnt explain that she doesnt just want someone to share her house, she wants someone who will share her LIFE. She also didnt really give you/the situation enough time to resolve itself naturally. Those two mistakes meant you never really stood a chance and I think she will work her way through a fair few "serial killers" before she finds compatible people to live with. That is...Unless she starts being a bit more brutaly honest about her expectations in the interview process

No big deal and Im sure you wotn let this hold you back, just two pretty complicated people colliding

I would go with you being part man. .....except I expect most men to grasp what Im saying fairly easily. Perhaps you have never been in a serious motor accident, if you had you would know even the hint of one is nothing to " laugh and tease" about.

The moment you put the girl on the back of your motorbike you are100% responsible for her safety. If you then crash.......You fail a very imprtant test and only variance really dictated the result involved bruised egos or broken bones. ie...the words "accident" and " no one got hurt" are irrelevant

Looking at it from HER point of view, its easy to see that the accident may well indicate flippancy for her safety. So either Im being melodramatic, you are very dim, or you are just sucking on davils internet wang in your usual manner without really thinking things through

seems like she was interviewing for a prospective fuck buddy

ahahahaha!!! Maestro, you are being melodramatic. Sure it could have gone badly, BUT IT DIDNT. Maybe it freaked her out and maybe she couldnt cope with that. Fair call i suppose, all Im saying as that I wouldnt have reacted in such a manner. Nor would I have gone off and plastered myself over another man.

Yes I have been in an accident which gives me even more of a grasp on the fact that this is no where near as dire as you are making out.

Perhaps you should take a chill pill.

NR, was that comment aimed at me..? I dont need a fuck buddy as I have a rather fabulous man.. But thanks for your offer anyway.

I thought you was taken with davil or has he taken you for a ride?

either way I'd beware his riding

hahahah serial killer.... hahahah yak ... gtfo ! she's a nut bar find some dudes to live with seriously .. women are mental bitches to live with.