dodgiest pissant little town on SH1

as i was missioning down to wellington this
weekend, it occured to me that vast sections of
nz are interbred cowtowns.

in particular, stopping for gas in pokeno, i was
served at the counter by two buck-toothed
interbred brothers lacking in basic
communication skills. nice enough, just "aint
too bright"

now i have heard that Thames is pretty bad, but
both pokeno and taihape (naturally) scare me.

i havent done the south island section of SH1, is
there anything more scary than pokeno?

Myself and a mate travelled down to P.North for the Universities Easter tourney a few years ago. On out trip we made an effort to stop in all the dogiest small towns we could find ...I have an interesting collection of photos of public toilets and the backs of all the trucks we got caught behind on the way.

I can't nail it down to any one town, but Taihape does give off an extrememly weird "gumboot" vibe.

...how was you trip Spacecadet?

and dont get anyone started on...... GORE hehe

aaahhhh the infamous gore. havent been there.

the trip was cool, im writing it up in an email
now, kind of a cyber diary for all involved. i can
drop ya a copy if you want, but prob makes more
sense if ya were there (seeing as im the writer
in the bunch, i write down all the cool stuff that
we do so we dont forget.)

some friends of mine were cornered in thames
once by bowl-cut dribbling locals, wouldnt let
them out of the park until they told them why on
earth they would want to live in auckland rather
than glorious small town nz

1 vote for Taumaranui as worst

And Bulls is definately my favourite, just watch out for the consta-bull hehe (or should that be cuntsta-bull?)

Bluff. It's the ass hole of NZ and I used to live there. It's worse than Gore.

what about levin? or, bulls. BORING!

and you wander why Aucklanders are so loved throughout the nation?

Because your a bunch of elitist whinging spoiled brats

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAA so true

im a turned aucklander. originally from a small
town myself escaped!

Waikanae or Greymouth.

The truth is, everyone outside of Auckland has some stupied shit-for-brains fucked up attitude towards Auckland and Aucklanders in general. It doesnt take a genius to work out that people with such uninformed bigioted opinions towards one third of the countrys population (and producers of the contrys general wealth) are a bit of a joke, and so we Aucklanders play up to that joke. You have your stupied opinions, we can't change them, we may as well live up to it. : )

can you see it?

i can.

its just over there, over yonder!

over that rise, ahh i have seen it many times before.

its always there.

doesn't go away..

its that tall poppy syndrome.

Palmy Nth counts as a small town. I lived there for a year, my shrink says I'll be in therapy till I'm 72.

Twizel, fucked up name and dead like a ghost town.

i do believe auckland ISN'T the producer of the countries greatest wealth, try the farming/forestry/produce sector....
and come on there is nothing great about auckland, apart from the availabilty of a good club on friday nights -- the need for this doesn't last forever though....
ps. i do live in auckland

Big daddy where would you rather live in NZ?
I used to live in Huia on the west coast 35 min drive to town from a forest national park, no sheep no farms, straight up beautiful NZ landscape. Not some landlocked green fields cow smelling hole like Hamilton or some other such small town.

How did this turn into a discussion about Auckland? I thought we were making fun of all the cousin kissers down country. Heres a joke:
Q:
What's the definition of a virgin in Taihape?
A:
Anyone who can outrun her brother.

To tell you the truth, I dont know what the makeup of our GDP is, but my perception is that our idea of our GDP is somewhat out of date... or possibly should be? I really dont know, thats just a feeling.

It turned into a discussion about AK when someone once again abused Aucklanders, and I'm sick of such dim-witted attitudes.

I like to annoy Wellingtonians when I'm down there by moaning that I can't get a good cup of coffee. It drives them crackers.

eukatahuna (sp?) and taihape are by far the worst. Eukatahuna looks like a ghost town and taihape has a gumboot throwing comp on the main road.
Good times...

whenever I drive throught the small towns, I
whistle "duelling banjo's" ...in the hope that they
will think I am one of them and leave me
alone...small town NZ can scare the living shit
out of me....and I aint an Aucklander (well, I live
here, but I is from Wellington, the airconditioned
city)
I am trying to remember the name of the small
hicktown just north of the Mangawekas.....

Hahaha Fish_Boy.

I remember the time I was taking the piss outta Aucklanders with regard to coffee and I got bites galore!

trouble with Wellington is the wind blows all the crema off the top before you get a chance to drink.

I find it disapointing when the lunch bars and cafes in small towns arent as nice as I imagine they would be - when they are about as good as all the little pissy ones in the Auckland city that shouldnt be in business.
I like lunch-bar and cafe exploring. : )

OI! Whats wrong with Thames! It was on the News yessterday...

cough*auckland*cough haha

Aaahhh, Palmie. Where swannies are all the rage...

You know, i'm an aucklander, and i almost agree with the rest of the country sometimes (notice i say sometimes, and almost) i love getting out of Auckland. Love coming back too tho...

where you come from again forest... oh dats right Pukekoke(sp)... haha

yea but it aint on state highway one jass :-p

hahahah so it dosnt count and for everybodies info if Pukekohe didnt exist then new zealand and half the world wouldnt have a lot of vegies. ;-p no bullshit there i no my growing stuff guys and girls

Well its not just small inbred towns… there are small minded inbred cities! Take Invercargill for example. It has around 50,000 people (however all one family) yet those 50,000 people treat you as if you looked like you came from outa space! My brother and I were in BK (had just been built a few months earlier…) and we dressed down to ‘try’ and blend in (although we didn’t have the chequered shirt with collar-up disease or the bad hair cut which are ‘cargill standards to blend in) and yet everyone still looked at us sideways and sniggered at us! And… hello, NZ, english speaking country… they spoke such a different dialect down there, I almost needed them to hold up subtitles!

Hey Spacecadet… remember when we used to drive through Tiahape and toot the horn at the local inbreds then wave out the other side?! Hehehe, small minded I know, but it was just so damn funny!!!

Invercargil

went there to day talk aboot milf farking hell.

so many young girls pushing prams that town is really fucked up

you know they call it invercarghole and stuck it at the bottom of the country for a reason.

That is right Forest (about every chick pushing a pram). I had forgotten about this. I guess if you don't get pregenant before 16, you get the hell out of there! So every young person who is still there is likely a parent!

I can remember looking at the price of houses (in the cheaper part of town). There were some for $24k, but then I looked further and you could buy a house (with the land!) for only $15k!!! The same old dump in Wgtn would be about $200-$300k!

Whats wrong with Huntly....

You all know that song?

Southlanders are the nicest people. I don't know what you guys are talking about. New Plymouth and Hawera have more kids with kids. I think they actually see being a single mum on the DPB as a career move.

Nelson gets my vote. Why? Because I lived there for so long.

I went into a fairly upmarket bar in Nelson last New Years and got called a "Fucken Aucklander". I'd only lived in Auckland for 3 months at the time! How could they tell?

Even after I made a special effort to wear my least expensive sunglasses!

Ok. can you beat Tuatapere. Or find it?

Kat.. at least its a stable occupation huh?.. No much chance of being made redundant!

Turua? has a diary and mechanic place. A hole if ill ever seen 1

and a powdered milk factory jass.

yeah Smiley Hugh and the New Zealanders, classic tune.

For all those heading to the Southern island this NYE go to Blenhiem. The poeple all wander around with a Zombie look in their eyes and the air seems stale.

And in the number of times i have been up and down this country I have never had more anti-auckland bull-shit than from people in Wellington. No insult to Welly love the place. But dam some people there are so set on the auckland bashing it is like a disease

I wouldn't take it so seriously. I was born & bred in Wanaka yet I get the JAFA jokes and insults all the time. I find it quite funny really. I'd much rather be a fucking Aucklander than a checkout chick at the Wanaka Four Square. I can just imagine hanging out for the weekend when I can hoon around with my bogan boyfriend in his Holden. A bottle of bourbon, pack of Winnies, sitting down by the lake...

Molatov - Blenheim is the testing ground for all sorts of weird army mind-control shit. Thats why they look so fried all the time. If anyone mentions "The High One" just make an "Urrrrggghhh" noise...

That is the exact same thought I had when i was there.
It must have something to do with the Waihopi listening station

You and dpt are regular conspiracy theorists huh?!

BEWARE OF CROMWELL.
in this settlement, the loc's are predominantly christian-"nothing wrong with that" you may say. well, what kind of good church goer, regularly attends dinners where your car keys are placed into a bowl at the front door ,then later all the wives dip for keys,then the owner of the keys in question will escort that wive home for the evening.
SETTLE DOWN. which brother/cousin/sister/aunt/uncle will you get with as a result of previous wrong dads

Seriously transT it is a scary place.
People move around like clubbers after a 5 day bing